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Funny/Interesting Stuff → Windows source code

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1. SpaceMan++ said on October 2, 2008, 08:14:29 PM (-07:00)

Zoroark
288 posts

my version:

Code:
//windows source code

#include <stdlib.h>
#include <stdio.h>
#include "windows.h"
#include "world_domination.h"
#include "monopoly.h"
#include <microsoft.h>
#include "evil.h"
#include "developers.h"

#define INSTALL HARD
#define SYSTEM_PERFORMANCE SLOW
#define MEMORY_USAGE LOW
#define PRICE 666
#define DEVELOPERS 666666
#define WINDOWS_VERSION Vista

int main()
{
	while (!CRASHED)
	{

		initialize();
		do_nothing_loop();
		destroy_linux_installations();
		load_splash_screen("windows_splash_666.bmp");

		if (FIRST_INSTALLATION)
		{
			display_splash_screen("bill_gates_rules.bmp");
			display_splash_screen("first_installation.bmp");
			destroy_linux_installations();
			load_files();
			wait(66666);
			printf("Welcome to Windows %s \n", WINDOWS_VERSION);

			if (!check_memory(66666666))
			{
				printf("Your system does not have required memory.\n");
				CRASHED = true;
			}

			install_prompt();
			install_files();
			install_fillers(666666);
			wait(66666666);
			printf("Windows was installed. Rebooting...\n");
			reboot();
		}

		else
		{
			load_files();
			stuff_memory(66666);
			show_login_screen();

			if (LOGGED_IN)
			{
				draw_desktop();
				load_processes();

				if (random(0,666) != 666)
				{
					display_bsod();
					CRASHED = true;
				}
				else
				{
					stuff_memory(66666);
					stuff_hard_drive(66666);
					stuff_registry();

					disable_linux();
					disable_firefox();

					send_microsoft_your_private_info(ALL);

					if (regexp_match_in_files(ALL_FILES, "/communist/"))
					{
						delete_files(ALL_FILES);
						CRASHED = true;
					}
					else
					{
						stuff_memory(66666);
					}

					if (FILE_OPENED)
					{
						if (get_publisher(get_current_file()) != "Microsoft" && get_file_type(get_current_file()) == "exe")
						{
							CRASHED = true;
						}
						else
						{
							open_file();
							stuff_hard_drive(66666);
						}
					}

					while (666 == 666)
					{
						display_error_messages();
					}
				}
			}
		}
	}

	shutdown();
	display_bsod();

	return EXIT_FAILURE;
}

2. Blues said on October 4, 2008, 04:47:23 AM (-07:00)

Regigigas
867 posts

WORLD DOMINATION! Destroy all Linux installations.

You forgot 'Macintosh is the tool of the devil'.

3. SpaceMan++ said on October 4, 2008, 11:05:15 AM (-07:00)

Zoroark
288 posts

Here's Steve Ballmer's code:

Code:
#include <microsoft.h>
#include <evil.h>
#include <monoply.h>
#include <developers.h>
#include <stdlib.h>
#include <stdio.h>

int main()
{
	int developers = 0; //zero developers at this time
	while (1+1 == 2) //1+1 is always equals to, so it's infinite loop
	{
		printf("Developers!");
		printf("We want Windows developers!");
		printf("No open-source developers!");
		printf("No Linux developers!");
		system("kill Linux");
		system("kill Google");
		system("kill Communists");
		microsoft.evilness = microsoft.evilness + 666; //Microsoft gained power!
		developers = developers + 1; //1 more developer
	}
	return 0; //never reach here
}

4. Blues said on October 4, 2008, 04:19:56 PM (-07:00)

Regigigas
867 posts

Microsoft.evilness=........Microsoft.evilness

Hah! Where do you generate these codes?

5. KingOfKYA said on November 9, 2008, 07:11:51 PM (-08:00)

Volcarona
523 posts

Keybord + Fingers

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