It's always interesting to know what people find interesting that someone said enough to have it memorized. So (if the mods don't mind that is) why not dump your favorite quotes here (Keep it clean. Censor it if need be).
I'll be sharing two, but I'll let the 2nd be told by the person who said it.
1. You know what's interesting about assassination? Well, not only does it change those popularity polls in a big freaking* hurry, but it's also interesting to notice who it is we assassinate. Ya ever notice who it is, got to think who it is we kill? It's always people who've told us to live together in harmony and try to love one another. Jesus, Gandhi, Lincoln, John Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy, Martin Luther King, Medgar Evers, Malcolm X, John Lennon – they all said, "Try to live together peacefully." Bam! Right in the freaking head! Apparently we're not ready for that. Yeah, that's difficult behavior for us. We're too busy thinking around, sitting around trying to think up ways to kill each other. -George Carlin
*- censored
2.

A place to post things from Scott Pilgrim, since I have the movie memorized? Well, ahem, "Here are only a few. For UUUUUUUbisoft-"*shot*
NSFW warning, although censored.

Scott: Oh God. I'm so... so alone.

Ramona: You're not alone.

Scott: What?

Ramona: You're just having some idiotic dream.

Scott: I'm dreaming? Does that mean we can make out?

Stacey: Hello?

Scott: It's Scott.

Stacey: What did he do this time?

Scott: No, it's Scott, it's really me.

Stacey: What did you do this time?

Scott: It's not me, it's everyone else that's crazy. Look, I'm having a total meltdown or whatever, are you still working?

Stacey: I'm literally about to leave.

Scott: Cool I'm coming in. *Walks in to store* I think I'll make it a decaf today.

Julie: SCOTT PILGRIM.

Scott: What did you do with my sister??

Stacey: *From outside* Sorry, I had to go! *Runs off*

Julie: So, what can I $%^& get you?

Scott: Is there anywhere you don't work?

Julie: They're called jobs. Something a %^&*ball like you wouldn't know anything about. And by the way, I can't $%^& believe you asked Ramona out after I specifically told you not to $%^&* do that.

Scott: How are you doing that with your mouth? *Referring to the censors*

Julie: NEVER $%^&* MIND HOW I'M DOING IT. What do you have to say for yourself?

Scott: Can I get a caramel macchiato?

Julie: You know, maybe it's high $%^& time you took a look in the mirror before you wreak havoc on another girl!

Ramona: Roxy?

Scott: You know this girl?

Roxy: Boy, does she. Know. Me..

Scott: What is she talking about?

Roxy: He really doesn't know?

*Ramona looks at Scott* *Scott looks at Roxy* *Scott gets it*

Scott: Wait... You and her!?

Ramona: It was just a phase.

Roxy: JUST A PHASE?

Scott: You had a sexy phase!?

Ramona: It meant nothing, I didn't think it would count.

Roxy: IT MEANT NOTHING?

Ramona: I was just a little bi-curious.

Roxy: Well honey. *Cracks fingers* I'm a little BI-FURIOUS!

Charlie Chaplin is one who I look up to in most my quotes.

Here's some quotes by him.

“A day without laughter is a day wasted.” 

― Charles Chaplin



“You'll never find a rainbow if you're looking down” 

― Charles Chaplin



“My pain may be the reason for somebody's laugh.

But my laugh must never be the reason for somebody's pain.” 

― Charles Chaplin

George S. Patton also has some I like a lot.

"If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking."

-George S. Patton



"Better to fight for something than live for nothing."

-George S. Patton



My two personal favourites.



"Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity."

-George S. Patton



"I don't measure a man's success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom."

-George S. Patton

Here's a quote I really appreciate from the great football coaching legend Vince Lombardi.

The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.

"Censorship is telling a man he can't eat a steak because a baby can't chew it." Mark Twain.

"WELCOME TO DIE!" -Konami's X-Men

One by the late and great George Harrison.
"Rap music is just computerised crap. I listen to Top of the Pops and after three songs I feel like killing someone."

I listen to a bit of rap here and there (nothing beyond 2007), but strangely enough that sounds like something I would say. AWWWW, COME BACK TO LIFE SO I CAN MARRY YOOOU!

"My grandkids always beat me at Rock Band. And I say, 'Listen, you may beat me at Rock Band, but I made the original records, so shut up.'" -Paul McCartney

Most favorite Paul quote ever.

I used to have a lot of quotes that I liked, but then I saw this thread and by comparison they're not very interesting quotes at all. But there's still this one.

“I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.”
― Bill Gates

"There's no such thing as normal."

"Live Long And Prosper"- Capt. Spock

"You are NOT the father" -Maury

"My Common Senses are tingling!" -Deadpool

"It's OVER 9,000!" -DBZ

EDIT:

"All worlds begin in darkness, and all so end. The heart is no different. Darkness sprouts within it, it grows, consumes it. Such is its nature. In the end, every heart returns to the darkness whence it came! You see, darkness is the heart's true essence." -Ansem